[UPDATE] My (23F) BF (25M) keeps asking me to shave my pubic hair and I'm losing my mind

Original post: here

I wasn't sure if it was worth updating such a small post but I'm a frequent lurker on this sub and I know I love all kinds of updates so I figured I'd go ahead. So I spoke to Alex Friday night and I basically just told him I needed him to tell me the truth about what was going on because I wasn't going to keep dealing with him asking me about it every week. I told him I loved him but he knew before we became official that I did not shave/wax my pubic area and I didn't understand why he had become so insistent on it. His response was...predicted by at least one of you.

He said he was actually never "okay" with how I kept my pubic area. He said that every girl he had been with before me was "clean" (his words) and that he decided to put up with hair because he wanted to date me but that truthfully it grossed him out every time he saw it. He also said that his friends "would have never considered dating a woman who didn't take care of herself" (again...his words) but that he wanted to look past the physical since he thought I could be special. I was pretty shocked to say the least since he'd even frequently joke with me about the porn industry's influence on grooming habits. I asked him why he didn't just tell me this as opposed to his ridiculous "most girls do it" argument. He said he just didn't know how to tell me the truth. I asked him if his plan was just to keep asking me until I gave in and he told me "eventually he was going to tell me the truth."

Long story short, I ended things. I know it may seem frivolous or petty to some people but to me it went beyond his preferences for pubic hair. He annoyed me with it for months and stuck to a stupid argument instead of being honest with me. To me, that shows immaturity. He's 25. Not 19. That's not a quality I want in my partner. Oh and also, I'm not sleeping with someone who thinks having pubic hair makes me "gross" and "unclean."

TL;DR: kept the pubes, ditched the man.

Edit: obligatory, didn’t expect this to blow up etc. Thank you to everyone for the super sweet messages! I’m really not an inspiration though, just a gal who’s learning to put her body’s health over her partner’s comfort. To all of y’all telling me I’m gonna die alone because I won’t shave - I like my own company so 🤷🏻‍♀️ that’s fine by me

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https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.newspostleader.co.uk/read-this/what-pizzagate-and-why-fake-news-scandal-trending-twitter-again-2879165%3famp

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My partner has recently come out as a transwoman - I feel less and less attraction towards her the further she transitions and it's putting a huge strain on our relationship. How do we navigate this new dynamic and not make it a dealbreaker since there are kids involved?

My partner (36F) and I (35F) have been married for 15 years. We have 3 kids together, two under the age of 10, and one teenager. I am a straight cis woman with no attraction whatsoever to other women. We are in the US.

Last year my husband came out as a transwoman. I've tried to be as supportive as possible and we have spent a lot of our savings on her surgeries. She's on hormones, she has plenty of feminine clothing and make up, and she's had multiple surgeries. The next surgery that she wants is to get a neovagina and while I've been cheering her on from the sidelines (what am I supposed to do?) this breaks my heart. I feel like I've lost the love of my life and when I look at her, I see a stranger. There's no attraction there and we haven't had sex since she's come out because I'm just not into it, even though she does keep trying to initiate.

My partner has been saying that I must be bisexual or pansexual because I fell in love with a transwoman but that's not true at all. We've gone to couples therapy and apparently she has felt this way since she was a little kid, which makes me feel even worse because I've told her everything, and I mean everything, about my life. I feel deceived and heartbroken and I can't even talk to any of our mutual friends about this because they're all rightly supportive about her bravery in coming out.

I don't know what to do. I've been used as emotional support for both my partner and my teenaged daughter who's apparently being bullied after her friends saw my partner picking her up from school wearing a short dress, heels and extensions. I've talked to my partner about not dressing like that when we're in public with the kids and she's agreed, but the damage has been done. Recently she has been sleeping on the couch because I just can't do it anymore.

She has all these new trans friends and I can't relate at all to any of them. I feel like she's jealous of me because I'm a cis woman because she makes comments when I'm on my period about how she wishes she could menstruate whenever I mention cramps and it's lead me to be secretive about even buying tampons. One time I came home to seeing her wearing my underwear (bra and panties) and being basically drowned in my perfume and jerking off to p*rn which has lead me to simply hiding those things because I don't see how I can even begin to bring this up.

I'm terrified of being seen as transphobic, because I'm not. She's a woman and that's what's making this so difficult. I'm not attracted to women at all. I want a husband, not a wife. But I know that if I divorce her now when she needs my emotional support more than ever it'll end very badly, and I don't want to have a negative relationship between us. I still love her and I want to be able to work this out. I've talked to her about all of this already but the lack of attraction and feelings of being deceived aren't going away. I feel like a real a-hole and I want to know if this relationship can be salvaged and how.

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