Everybody thought having a calculator on you at all times was gonna be a gamechanger but the real shit is having a flashlight

Edit: to any smartphone developers reading the comments it seems pretty obvious which feature the people actually want on their devices

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The elected representative you deserve

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TIFU by giving my boyfriend a DNA test for his birthday

Edit: the DNA test was a 23&me health and ancestory kit

So this happened back in August but he finally got the results back a few weeks ago. But brace yourselves, this is some soap opera shit.

Turns out he has a half sister and aunt he never knew about. Both the aunt and sister are on his dads side of the family so... he spoke to his dad.

His dad didn’t know the aunt, although she shared the same last name as his family and his dad never knew he had a daughter but the timeline of events checked out.

Next, my boyfriend went to Facebook and searched the hell out of his half sister. She looks EXACTLY like his dad.

Needless to say, his dad was shocked. They were trying to figure out how to tell the rest of the family.

My boyfriend didn’t want to message her first because she may not know she was adopted or if she didn’t know who her real dad was.

This week, his half sister finally messaged my boyfriend.

She asked if he was adopted.

He proceeded to tell her he thought SHE was adopted because she looks exactly like his dad.

Then she said HE looks exactly like HER DAD!!

Needless to say everyone was confused.

They send pictures of their fathers and my boyfriend did indeed look like her dad.

But there’s still the question of, who is the aunt?? And do the half sister and aunt know each other?

Yes. Yes they do. The half sister said the aunt is her aunt. Yet, my boyfriend and aunt share the same last name??

So now my boyfriend is asking his mom if there is any way he has a different dad.

She is adamant that he does not.

Until my boyfriend sends the picture of his half sisters dad and his mom absolutely recognized the man.

Turns out, my boyfriends dad and mom were on a break and his mom hooked up with this man. His mom and dad got back together almost immediately after my boyfriend was conceived so they assumed my boyfriend was the product of their relationship and not her fling.

They were wrong.

Turns out, my boyfriend is the product of his moms fling and has a dad he never knew about.

He also has 4 new half siblings, 1 aunt, 1 uncle, 5 cousins, grandparents, and 2 nephews. All who he never knew about.

And get this, one of his new siblings was born the SAME year as him and has the SAME name!!

As for the aunt who shares the same last name as my boyfriend, we’re not sure if it’s coincidence or if she’s somehow related to his “adopted” dads side of the family.

It’s only been a few days but everyone is taking the news surprisingly well.

My boyfriends “adopted” dad is such a saint and is encouraging my boyfriend to get to know his bio dad and family.

My boyfriend has since been communicating with his bio dad and 2 half siblings and it’s going great.

They seem like such a kind, loving, and welcoming family.

Although this was such a shock for everyone, it’s turning out to be the best case scenario for such a strange situation.

So yeah, I essentially gave my boyfriend a whole new family for his birthday. You’re welcome boo!

TL;DR: I got my boyfriend a DNA test and it resulted in him finding out the dad who raised him isn’t his biological dad and he has a whole new family!

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It's Official Halo Infinite has a shader system and that ABSOLUTELY UNACCEPTABLE.

To be clear, I am ok with this for weapons, and vehicles. I'm ok with it for patterns and textures. Those a relatively newer to player expression in the Halo series and are not as important to customizing our spartans. They monetized and players can still express themselves fine. Taking away our primary/secondary/tertiary colors however, is not fine. Color customization has been a way of player expression ever since COMBAT EVOLVED. It's been there even before armor customization, and restricting that was done in Halo 5: Guardians. (Look how that turned out) Colors and Armor pieces are fundamental aspects of player customization and expression, everything else is more or less extra. There is no way 343 did THIS with the intention of expanding player expression in multiplayer. This is unacceptable.

EDIT: For Reference in case (For whatever unlikely reason) a 343/ Microsoft employee sees this here are monetary avenues that I'm pretty sure the community will support (At least I will)

-Armor patterns

-Armor Textures

-Weapon Coatings

-Vehicle Coatings

-Visor Colors

-Future Armor Sets(Provide some at launch like 3/Reach/4)

-Future Emblems(Provide some at launch like 3/Reach/4)

-Nameplates

-Armor Effects

Edit 2: Wow, 23 awards that's nuts. Thank you, so much. I guess some people agree with me.

Edit 3: This is probably gonna be my last edit (we'll see about that) But to the people confused of what a "Shader System" is. A shader is a developer-made preset color pallet that Destiny 1 and 2 use for player customization. Essentially you have no control over the individual colors. Just a choice of select combinations.

That being said, I do want keep an open mind still. There are some cool pros to this like new textures and patterns for armor, weapons and vehicles. The sacrifice of individual choice of colors is way too much of a drawback, considering it's been such a fundamental piece of player customization for so long.

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As her first act in the resistance, during the second world war, Simone Segouin (1925) stole a bicycle from the German military to get around. Later on she would take part in missions as blowing up bridges, capturing German troops,... Earlier this month she celebrated her 95th birthday.

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Older face palm for shits. It's way worse now.

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Official Discussion - Borat Subsequent Moviefilm

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Summary:

Follow-up film to the 2006 comedy centering on the real-life adventures of a fictional Kazakh television journalist named Borat.

Director:

Jason Woliner

Writers:

Peter Baynham, Sacha Baron Cohen

Cast:

  • Sacha Baron Cohen as Borat

  • Maria Bakalova as Tuta Sagdiyev

  • Tom Hanks as Himself

  • Dani Popescu as Premier Nazarbayevdx

  • Manuel Vieru as Dr. Yamak

  • Miroslav Tolj as Nursultan Tylyakbay

  • Alin Popa - HueyLewis / Jeffrey Epstein Sagdiyev

-- Rotten Tomatoes: 82%

Metacritic: 67

VOD: Amazon Prime

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I don't like sand.

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This is so wholesome

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She asked "what's your zodiac sign" in her bio

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