So I bartend at a Mexican restaurant and we often have guests that share the burrito. It isn’t uncommon to have people ask if we can cut the burrito in half for them. The thing is: we give them a steak knife for the burrito so they can cut it up whatever way they want. Whenever someone requests that the burrito be cut in half I let them know we’re going to get them a proper knife for the table and that’s usually the end of the conversation. Sometimes it’s an older guest or a parent with some young kids and in that case of course we’ll help you out because you need the help.
So one day two young couples came in to dine with us and I got that request from one of the young guys as he and his girlfriend were going to share the burrito. I let him know we would get him a steak knife but it wasn’t enough for him. He was insisting that we cut it and getting pretty fucking heated about it. Unless these two were going to swallow each half like snakes I didn’t see the point. I got tired of trying to explain that he can use the knife however he wants and finally acquiesced.
What pissed me off is after I agreed he sat back all smug and put his arm around his girl and said “You see? That wasn’t so hard was it?”
So I put the order in and told the chef “We’re gonna cut this burrito in half for this guy but we’re going to do it lengthwise.” He was confused at first but when I told him about this kid he was all for it.
So the food came up and I ran it for them. A burrito beautifully cut in half evenly across the whole length of the burrito. It was impressively done actually!
I dropped the food and I could tell he was pissed. I was rehearsing my response in my head but he didn’t say anything. I think he got the point that I wouldn’t give a shit what he had to say anyway.
So after a silent time serving them they got the bill, didn’t tip, left quietly and left a one star review the next day and never returned.
Nowadays when I ask the chef to cut the burrito for a family or some other guests that could use the help he jokingly asks me which way he should cut it.
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