I M39 lost my late wife 6 years ago. I have a16 year old son 'Daniel' and I recently got engaged to my fiancee of 2 years. Her mom and I aren't on good terms because of how she behaves. She's a controlling, self-centered, Dolly parton wanna be. I learn to ignore her crap but she's been annoying Daniel and criticizing his personality regularly (he's a private kid and still hasn't gotten used to the new family dynamic but he's in therapy and is doing fine) she keeps diagnosing him left and right calling him anti-social, autistic and other crap.
Fact is, Daniel is a shy, well manared kid but people confuse that with being "anti-social". MIL tried several time to force Daniel to "open up" by embarrassing him with personal questions on family dinners and "test" his personality type.
I've realized the effect her behavior had on Daniel so I gave him the choice to no longer be in the same room/house as MIL and he appreciated this alot. MIL didn't like that Daniel kept his distance and no longer visits and kept bitching about how spoiled he will become for her daughter to deal with. I told her to stop bringing it up but she cried "I'm just doing this for Daaannny;"
Last week she visited unexpectedly wanting to say hi to Daniel. After Daniel greeted her he went into the bathroom and she went into the livingroom with my fiancee. I was in my bedroom when Daniel came and said his journal was gone. We looked for it but didn't find it. I asked my fiancee who was alone in the kitchen but didn't see it. I paused for a second to ask where MIL was, My fiancee said in the living room but I saw her coming down the stairs. I asked where she was, she said the bathroom. I saw her purse in hand so I bluntly asked if she took Daniel's journal. She looked offended and called for my fiancee when I insisted to see inside her purse. She wanted to leave but I didn't let her. Fiancee told me to stop it but I insisted and the journal was there. MIL tried to explain this was her only chance to get to know Daniel better because "she cares about him". I blew up at her and berated her for stealing from my son and told her she's banned from my house for the stunt she pulled. she argued with me then left. My fiancee apologized for her but said banning her from the house was over the top. It backlashed and and FIL argued and hoped his daughter realizes how f///ing ab///ve I am and call off the wedding for refusing to apologize to MIL. Fiancee said her family won't come to the wedding til I reconcile with her mom and cancel the ban but I won't let my son be disrespected in his own house and asked my fiancee to understand. I'm refusing to reconcile but am aware this could ruin my relationship with all my inlaws not just MIL and my fiancee thinks I'm selfish to cause drama.
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