TIFU by telling my gf, that she is not the only beautiful woman in existence.

We were watching guardians of the galaxy Vol2. There is this green insecthumanoid alien called „mantis“ that gets called ugly by one of the main characters all through out the movie. While watching i said something along the lines of:“ pff i don’t even think she’s ugly. I actually find her damn sexy.“ My gf chuckled and didn’t react any further, i didn’t think for a second that this was a stupid thing to say. After all, thats a fictional alienlike creature in a movie.

Well on the next day she called me and said she didn’t like the comment and it made her feel weird. We haven’t been exclusive for all to long and she doesn’t like me admiring other women like that. I thought that was kinda childish at first and said:“ okay im sorry about that. But why does this upset you? I mean, she is a fictional character. Even if not, you DO know that you are not the only beautiful woman in existence, do you?“ I don’t know why these things come to my head and why i speak them before realizing how stupid it is.

Now she is pissed and i sleep on the couch

TL;DR: reminded my gf that there are other beautiful women out there and now i sleep on the couch.

Edit: i decided to sleep on the couch myself. There was tension, she didn‘t intervene, so i went with it.

Edit2: we talked about it, the issue is resolved and it was not such a big deal.

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(CODENAME: S.O.C.K.) Mod Team was approached by several news agencies. We don’t feel comfortable speaking on your behalf. So we have a mission for you, should you choose to accept it… ***cue Mission Impossible music***

Alright good afternoon my wrinkle wizards and smoothbrain boners, we’ve got a situation on our hands and things are looking…spicy.

{"c":"HODL ON!!!! (don\u2019t try this at home)","e":"gif","id":"6dl9q3os3k381"}

So over the past couple months, we’ve had the Mainstream Media (MSM) reach out to the Mod Team for interviews. We told them all no, we can’t do interviews. For transparency purposes, these news agencies are Reuters, Market Watch, Wall Street Journal, & CBC (Canadian Broadcast Company). Hell, we even had a possible connection to a US Senator lol. We haven’t done anything with them other than some initial back and forth to find out what they want. It’s not our place to speak on behalf of the Apes. We do not represent Apes, we do not speak for Apes, and we sure as hell aren’t gonna try.

Recently, we’ve had an uptick in outside agencies reaching out and if we’re honest, we think SuperStonk and the Apes are gonna be dealing with a lot more of the press/politicians as we get closer to MOASS. As such, the Mods have felt we need to collaborate with you guys on a game plan for dealing with these agencies, together as a community, because it’s gonna be a bumpy ride.

{"c":"(for real, don\u2019t try this at home)","e":"gif","id":"mvexvi9u3k381"}

So here’s what we know: We received modmail with requests for interviews, we asked about what, some have responded, some have not, and here we are. One of them had a focus on why we were so adamant about Computershare and what changes we’ve noticed since moving our shares into our names. We expect that soon, others will reach out and want us to say something. Especially when we start seeing the stock price add some commas 😉. Until the subreddit figures out how to proceed, we’re gonna leave them on “Read.”

How do you guys think we should proceed with the news? Should we engage? If so, how? Do you want to directly talk to them? Or should we tell them to fuck off? We want to hear your thoughts and ideas. The Mods do have an option to manually approve reporters if you wish to invite them to the subreddit to ask their questions. It’s a lot of ground we need to cover. And because of how open ended this situation is, the Mods would like to pitch an idea to you.

(this can be tried at home)

…is band together and use the combined skills of the community to develop and create the first Superstonk Official Communications Kit (S.O.C.K.) to give to reporters when they come knocking.

CODE NAME: S.O.C.K.(definitely don’t try this at home)(you’ve already tried this at home)

The SOCK would ideally have some basic stuff that says who we are and what we’re about. What do we like? What do we not like? Something to give the MSM a clear picture of what it means to be an Ape of Superstonk. It would need to be a polished document that is fact checked and peer reviewed and yes, it needs to look “presentable” to the outside world.

Or you can just say fuck that idea lmao. It totally doesn’t matter. The Mods are putting the power of our representation to the world in your diamond hands. However you guys want to decide this, whether it be a committee, or an election, or whatever, you guys just come up with the idea and the Mods will watch and support you beautiful Apes along the way (we will still moderate the subreddit lmayo you can’t break rules for this).

I’m a firm believer that when enough critical thinkers get together, then any problem can be solved and we just so happen to have an entire network of people asking the right questions. We don’t speak on your behalf, so we present you with this mission, and should you choose to accept it, we will let you go and do your thing. We want this to be a community driven effort. By the Apes, For the Apes.

Some pointers up front: you guys are gonna figure out how tricky it is to maneuver this size of a group. Sometimes it’ll be a delicate dance with a rope and floor and gravity.

{"c":"(I'd be impressed if you could try this at home, but don't try this at home)","e":"gif","id":"2u15f92y3k381"}

You’ll need to use your wrinkles and your wits. And don’t go full smoothbrain 😂


{"c":"(SAFELY try this at home and make a Superstonk meme lol)","e":"gif","id":"3uolo1jy3k381"}

So now you guys know basically what we know and I’m fascinated to see how you’re going to react. From here, the Mods will liaison and support where necessary. Ball’s in your court. Godspeed, Ape.


{"c":"(can you even try this at home? lol please don\u2019t try)","e":"gif","id":"gjcihmez3k381"}

lol jk there’s no destruction

XOXO the Superstonk Mods 🦍💎✋🚀🌕🐳🚽🦙🐸🍦

TA;DR: The mod team is seeing an uptick in inquiries from MSM outlets requesting interviews and questions. The mod team does not speak for you. So, this is your chance. Do you want us to tell them to fuck off? Or do you want to talk to them? Or maybe, as a community, you could put together the S.O.C.K. (Superstonk Official Communications Kit) to give to reporters? You decide! Time to speak up!

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i will try to guess what kind of music you listen to from your username and avatar

EDIT: guys i didn’t expect so many comments, i have to go study. you can try to guess other people’s now:)

i will reply to all the comments slowly but surely

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I'd love to see a movie based on this

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Movie being filmed right in front of this neighborhood

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Let's look at the Bright Side, Shall we?

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Better.com CEO lays off 15% of workforce over zoom call.

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The island of Lana'i has a free range cat rescue with over 600 cats

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Bees falling out of the sky when the lights go out

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