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Edit: I just want to say that not wanting to date a trans person doesn't make you transphobic. Everyone has preferences.
Edit 2: ok to clarify some things I think I might be a trans girl and am just asking to gauge how much rejection I could be in for in the future.
Ok so this happened several days ago. I got out of a relationship about a year ago and impulsively went searching on Reddit in the r/r4r. I live in a small town in the US and it hasn’t been easy for me to meet anyone because of restrictions and my own fear of getting covid. I end up finding this girl that seems kind of intriguing. We come from similar cultural backgrounds and seemed to have similar interests and everything, and our conversations were going well over text. Plus, she was located 15 minutes way from my house. We ended up meeting in person and things started out normal.
We chilled, had dinner, and watched Netflix. All of a sudden she starts touching me intently. Given that it’s been sometime since anyone has shown me any affection, I’m all for it. Things escalate. She starts grabbing me, squeezing me, holding me close. Not terrible…..this is where things take a turn. Then she started talking about how she was raped…..on the first date….I’m like OK let’s try to not talk about that, it’s a downer and not something I’m comfortable talking about, at least not now…..so then the conversation turns to how she used to self harm….uhh ok, I repeat the same thing because I want to try and keep it positive. Next she starts talking about her long history of mental illness….I feel terrible at this point, but that shitty feeling doesn’t negate my hornyness.
Next thing I know I’ve finished my cocktail and we’ve started making out. I end up having sex with her and giving her a ride home. Throughout the whole car ride she was making detailed plans for me to spend Christmas with her and her extended family….uhhh ok. When she got home, she told me how much she loved me and that she wants to move in and change her job so that she can be with me. I have met this person ONCE! Now I don’t know how to tell her that I’m a bit uncomfortable seeing her anymore. She seemed nice enough, but she came on super strong. I’m too kind to ghost completely and have absolutely no idea how the hell to deal with this.
TL:DR - Got horny, met a redditor, had sex, she declared her love for me on the first date and now seems to be obsessed with me. Told me she is mentally unstable and that she wants to be with me forever. Apparently plans have been made for me to meet her family and spend Christmas with them….fml
Edit: holy shit this blew up! When I finish my work day I’ll write an update and do my best to respond to the comments.
PS, I’m afraid of being murdered.
Edit #2: OK, let me start by saying that 1) she was pushing ME for sex. Not the other way around. She was the one that initiated physical contact and pushed from there. 2) she wasn’t telling me these things in a way that would have given me a reason to think she wasn’t of sound mind. She was saying these things too casually. It seemed like she was telling me these things because she wanted to test my tolerance. Also, please note that she didn’t only talk about when she was raped, self harm and her ongoing struggles with mental illness. She spent the whole time talking about all kinds of innocuous stuff that I haven’t mentioned in my post, while only casually segueing into the subjects I described above. If I hadn’t been drinking, I probably would have been like a deer in the headlights and noped the fuck out, but of course, that wasn’t how it went down. Instead, I let her continue pushing me and trying to get me in the mood, and she ultimately succeeded. What she had said didn’t really sink in right away, it was only during the act that I started to realize how big a mistake this truly was. Not long after we started, my shlong went soft as I thought more about it. I was unable to perform.
Don’t get me wrong. I know this was a monumental fuck up, which is precisely why I posted it in r/tifu in the first place.
Edit #3 please stop saying “don’t stick your dick in crazy “ it’s been said a thousand times already.
Edit #4 Please stop asking me “is her name ______”. I’m not going to share her name. Fuck off.
I switched to eating proteins for breakfast (eggs, cheesestick wrapped with lunch meat, etc.), and it was life changing. I used to eat cereal or some other form of carbohydrate (muffin, toast, etc) every morning and would feel awful around 9:30 or 10am. I later took a class in nutritional physiology and learned about how your body's insulin response can overcompensate for your sugar intake, then resulting in low blood sugar a few hours later.
I know this doesn't happen for everyone, but it did for me, and it was significantly life altering when I switched!
Edit: Ok, I'm surprised at how many of you are offended at my cheese/lunchmeat go-to breakfast item LOL. I know it might not be the best or freshest or most organic or healthiest source of cheese/protein but it's cheap and I'm poor and in graduate school. Calm down lol. If you have money to buy the good cheese and meat more power to you- most people do not.
Edit: Wow, definitely wasn't expecting this much of a response! Thanks for all the awesome comments/advice/suggestions- I do enjoy talking nutrition! I do want to emphasize that while I do have training in nutritional physiology, I am not a certified nutritionist. But I am honored that so many of you are reaching out for advice. :) I simply wanted to share something that really helped me out in a way that was practical for most people to utilize in their lives. I will try to reply to as many of you as I can- but, it is Friday afternoon... so I will likely be indulging in some carbohydrate rich alcoholic beverages here soon. ;) Wishing you all the best!
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