I'm a 30 year old male and my best friend got married last week. I just bought a house and my wife is expecting out son in November, so I let him know I was limited in what I could contribute financially, but did tell him I would try my best. So, I wend to the bachelor party in Maine, I rented the tux, and paid for mine and my wife's dinner at the rehearsal dinner. I also had a gift of $300 that I was going to give them, but we will get to why I didn't give it to them.
His (now wife, then fiance) texted me multiple times a day with updates--fine. I didn't always respond and it got to the point where if I didn't repsond at LEAST once a day, I'd get a call from my buddy. (I have a full time job and am redoing some rooms in my house, so I'm busy.) She texted me for the following reasons:
My wife was NOT allowed to talk about our pregnancy, at all. She didn't want anyone to focus on that more than her, the bride.
She was NOT going to order special food for my wife (no one asked her to, my wife was fine with whatever she was going to be served.)
I was not helping the groom enough, he had to help her with favors, seating charts and programs, so I had to help him with those things, according to her. She also said to get ready to help with thank you notes after the wedding.
She said if I was a true best man, I would offer to pay for the bar bill. I don't even know what that means.
She had to read a approve my speech before the rehearsal dinner and wanted to be include as much, as my buddy. She told me to make up things if I had to. I was also NOT allowed to include anyone but the two of them and no inside jokes or stories about my buddy that didn't include her.
Her last text said to tell my wife to keep it together and not make a pregnancy scene during the wedding. Also, she wanted her to choose a dress that downplayed her pregnancy as much as possible.
I was just so aggravated, I spoke to my friend to see if he could reason with her. He told me to just play ball on this one, it's her day and to cut him a break, because he'd be dealing with her nonsense for the rest of his life. I was annoyed but calmed down.
The day of, all the bride and my buddy do is scold me, berate me and bark orders. I head down to the bar for the a drink...the bride's mother is there and warns me not to get drunk because I've ruined her daughter's day enough. Final straw.
I didn't give them the card with the cash and in the speech, I used my friend's exact wording about having to deal with her nonsense for the rest of his life. I wished them the best and told him I'd always be there for him, especially during the divorce. AITA?
I was raised by a hardcore racist, “hardcore” as in would and probably still is harassing non white people on the daily assaulting them and being a all around pos, now I don’t associate myself with them anymore.
I’ve been working on myself for about 3 years now and it’s been going great I’m at a point where the only problems I have are subconsciously, I’ll be playing frustrated or mad at something like a game and it will just slip out I don’t go out of my way to say it but it happens, I always get mad at myself and get even more frustrated when this happens and I always get so pissed off on how far I’ve come and it just happens, And I’m just wondering what am I doing wrong for me to still be doing this? What can I do to better myself further? Thanks
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