Using a throwaway account I made for another embarrassing FU years ago. Unlike most FUs, this happened today.
So, I really like Orbeez. I just think they’re neat. A few months ago, me and my bf put a bunch of em in a big bowl to mess around with. We filled socks with the orbs and then put the socks on, dumped the orbs on each other when the other didn’t expect it, stuff like that. I’d recommend that everyone play with a bucket of Orbeez at some point in their life, it’s a good time.
One of the things we did was put some in a condom, tie it off so the orbs were compacted together, and then stick it inside myself. No, it wasn’t to satisfy some sort of egg sac sexual fantasy, although if anyone here is into that then Orbeez are the way to go. Mostly it was just for shits and giggles, but it was surprisingly functional as a sex toy, so I kept it and occasionally used it as a malleable g-spot stimulator.
So today said bf and I were havin a sexy time and he decided to bring out the orb-filled condom. Then the condom broke, opening the floodgates for hundreds of orbs to fill my lady parts. I didn’t feel them at first, but when I contracted my pelvic floor muscles they gushed out like multicolored alien eggs. Obviously the orbs had to come out, but the whole thing was more funny than frustrating, both of us making cursed jokes and laughing (and tbh the laughing helped push them out). The de-orbing was a team effort and took about 10 minutes. All in all it was strange but oddly enjoyable experience, though not one I want to repeat. Not the worst thing that can result from a condom breaking.
Tl;dr I am the reason that there might one day be a “not for internal use” disclaimer for Orbeez
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